Be careful of what you wish for (wink, wink)

4 min readMar 24, 2020

When my son Connor was in middle school, he brought his homework over to my place one weekend. He and I sat down and worked on it together. This memory was a rare event because Connor did not bring homework with him on our weekends. To me, I loved this because it was normalizing my every other weekend. Does that make sense?

I have read the blogs or have seen the videos on Instagram of parents who are home working with their kids right there as well; due to schools being closed.

With more and more companies sending their employees home and with schools moving to the online teaching model, I have become super jealous of these families. Sound strange?

When I was married the first time, I will admit I took the time with Connor for granted, and I have paid the price for that mentality. When you get married, you think that “Until Death…” but in my situation, that was not the case. I’m still plagued with the guilt of time lost because thinking that marriage was going to be the one and done for me.

With the way our world is right now and not sure where this virus is going, both companies and schools are taking precautions. News outlets are showcasing time to their news broadcast of kids and parents just trying to survive each day. As I mentioned, this is where my jealousy comes into play.

As of this writing, the company that allows me to receive a paycheck has grounded many of us road warriors. I am delighted to be off the road. My wife will have some adjusting, but I miss being home regularly. However, a side note of my gut is telling me that I might end up eventually getting laid off. We will cross that bridge. Anyway, our kids are older(23, 18, 17), I foresee there won’t be a need helping with homework, but none of the kids live with my wife Ann, and I full time. We are a blended family, and the oldest is at grad school.

I wish our kids were younger (I know to be careful of what you wish for), and they were here all together. Watching them doing their schooling or even making them snacks and lunch would be something beautiful. Yes, I have seen parents stressed out because they are trying to juggle work and the kids all at the same time. Would I be able to handle that type of stress? Honestly, most likely not, but I would at least like to try.

We are in a unique situation. Here in Colorado, we currently do not have severe lockdowns like other states. People are still going to work. As I look out of the home office window, the green garbage containers are waiting to be picked up. To me, that is normal, but I am aware that it truly is not how the world is operating in reality.

I recently spoke to a gentleman named Marco about how he and his wife are dealing with working from home and having their three kids also home? He said that it’s crowded in their NY apartment. It can be loud. Marco told me that he has set up a temp office on one side of the apartment, and his wife is on the other side. As we were talking, I was not aware of all of the craziness that was going on in his world. All I felt was how I wish my son were in our house.

With-in my world right now, my two bonus daughters are here. I am very once again jealous because of the obvious that my son is at his moms’ house. That will change unless the Governor states that we are going to be locked down. That could be a good thing for my son. When I told you about how I helped him with his homework? The next day I received a nasty email from my former wife to let me know all of his answers were wrong. So, maybe it is a good thing Connor is not here to do his homework. However, if he were here, there definitely would be chaos with having the whole family under one roof. That my friend is a risk, I am willing to take. Be careful of what you wish for (wink, wink)

Tommy Maloney is the Executive producer and host of the podcast Blending The Family, where you can find on ITUNES, Iheart Radio, Spotify, and Stitcher Radio.

Tommy has spoken at TEDx, Ignite Fort Collins, and Keynote Speaker at Everything Dad Convention. He even has won speaking awards through Toastmasters International.

The author of the books “25 Tips For Divorced Dads.” “Why not you, Why Not Me” and His new book, “My Dad’s Advice At 5:04 AM” is coming out in 2020. He has written for magazines: The Good Men Project, Modern Gladiator, and Nurture Magazine. Plus, he has been a guest writer.

Tommy enjoys a good red blend while writing or hiding from the family. A dad to Betsy, Becca, Connor, and Duke. A husband to Ann.